Thou Shalt Say NO

You know those people that have a hard time saying NO, so they offer a long explanation as to why they aren’t going to do something?  Instead of saying NO, they say “Well I have this to do…” or “Well let me think about it because I may have to do…” or “I really want to but…” You’ve heard it before, maybe you have even said one of those phrases yourself. 

It is okay to say NO. It is okay to say NO to things that don’t advance you. It’s good to Say NO to things that don’t add to your life. It is okay to say less and say NO without explanation and a background story. It is a good thing to have control over how you spend your time. It is a good thing to have control over whom you spend your time with. It is good to have control over what events or causes you attach yourself to.  

We often hear the phrase “protect your space”. Part of protecting your space is protecting your boundaries and part of setting boundaries is saying NO.  

Until our next round table discussion, 

~Live Loud~Work Smart~Play Hard~Travel Plenty~Dance Always~

Tamu. 

Be Absolute-No Chaser Needed

Life attempts to bring us restrictions in one form or another: from people telling us what we are and are not capable of to where we live or work. So, if those restrictions come from outside forces, why should we add to it by limiting ourselves? 

We should not change our visions because of what appears to be a limitation. We should not put ourselves in a box or give ourselves a glass ceiling because of what looks like a roadblock or a rejection. We may have to adjust our paths and/or our tasks, but we should stay true to our visions and aspirations. Keep them large; don’t downsize them. 

Talk about those aspirations as a matter of fact. Be absolute.

Cheers.

I Don't Need A Man

“I’m going to pray that you get a husband.”

How would you respond if someone said this to you?

Here was my response, “No don’t do that.  If you want to say a meaningful prayer for me, pray that my business grows leaps and bounds beyond my imagination.” Then, I walked away quickly. I walked away quickly because I had more to add; some nice additions, some not-so-nice, petty additions.

I started to wonder if the woman was married or had ever been married. Her comment to me meant that she assumed that marriage is something I aspire to. I thought Ms. I’ll Pray You Get a Husband Lady’s unsolicited almost-prayer was a generational “thing.”  I had forgotten about this exchange until recently. I keep getting asked, “Are you married” or “Have you been married” by people of broad age ranges. My next “wonder” is why is this the focus question as if the only, major thing in life is to be married.

If a woman wants to be married, that’s wonderful.  Just like it’s wonderful if she wants to travel the world, or become a speaker, a real estate mogul, an author, or a business owner, or all the above. She should have what she wants and shouldn’t accept anything else. Recently, I was in a group where the question, “What do you want to have accomplished in five years?” was posed to everyone. Do you want to guess what the most common answer was?! “I want to be married with kids.” (If you could see my face!)  On the other side of that, I will say that if marriage is a desire, that does not mean that marriage is the only thing on a life list.

However, marriage does not put the cherry on top of life.  Stay tuned for Part 2.

So, how would you respond if someone said this to you?